This popped up in my Insta feed Monday from comedian Ali Wong. You know, just the average aftermath of a weekend with a couple of kids, right?

While I’m guessing this probably isn’t your reality, I’m also guessing these feelings of overwhelm, surrender, and most certainly, exhaustion are palpable in this image. I know I feel it. Many of us live with these emotions on a day to day basis which only undermine our self-esteem and diminish whatever enthusiasm remains of a “can-do” attitude. Aside from the constant and compulsive sorting, tidying and purging, what could Ali do to wrangle this mess? One answer – get help – reach out to a professional. Now, I’m not saying this because I am a pro. I am saying this because when you live this way, it becomes impossible to see your stuff, much less have the energy to think of ways to wrangle it.

Take a look around your family room right now. See that tv cart in the corner, the one that used to hold your boxy tv? I bet it’s holding a dvd player, that dvr thing, maybe a cable box, and an entire collection of dvds. See it? No? It’s right there against the wall. I cannot tell you how many times this piece of furniture is literally UNSEEN to a client. Actually invisible. I may point it out to a client and their response unfailingly is, “Oh that? That’s where we keep our dvds.” Let me be the first to tell you, absolutely no one needs to see your dvds at all times, especially you. My immediate next stop? A nearby closet. Without fail, I open the closet and find:

Behold. Well, now I know why the dvd’s aren’t kept in the closet.

I have unearthed the root cause of living with recurring clutter – Closet Zero. There will be no further talk of redecorating this home until we get a handle on this mess…because until this closet changes, this client’s way of living won’t change. And my ultimate goal as a designer and realtor isn’t just to shop for pretty things for us to buy. I truly want you to love how you live.

I implore you, before you take one step towards #konmari-ing the hell out of that closet, to take a look at its interior structure. Most likely, you will see a single bar running across the top and, if you’re lucky, a narrow shelf above it. Recognize and understand that no amount of Container Store bins or boxes in the world are going to help you free yourself from this hideous muffin top of domestic insanity until you have the right structure in place.

If you are more of a DIY kind of person, at least install some wire shelving. Do yourself that favor. Still, I whole-heartedly believe that a professional is best. You need someone who can assess and provide you with a solid design plan. Whether that person is a professional designer, a professional organizer, a professional closet installer, or a professional friend (a handy one is best,) you need help. Ideally, this magical person will implement a customized system so that you can store, sort, file, and hide all of your newly organized must-keep-crap. Once it’s all installed, I guarantee we will find a better place for those dvds. And in a few weeks, I will show you how I’ll have turned this closet into a model of office storage efficiency. My closet installer says he deals in shame. And you know what? He’s right.